NOVEMBER 12 1999

I was walking home the other day and looked in to the sky... the stars were so big and bright, it made me laugh my head off, right there in the middle of the field. It reminded me how completely insignificant we all are. Everything we do, though out our entire lives, really means shit. Only if you look at it on a grand scale however. If we place our self's at the center of the universe, every thing is not shit. Everything we do has huge significance to the whole universe... mainly our self. I took an on line survey to see if I had been abducted by aliens... it wouldn't let me process my results, not doubt due to alien interference. We will never be able to travel though time, sadly... I have been waiting for an old Blaise to show up at my door for as long as I can remember, and he has never came... I know I would not make myself wait this long to meet myself. I'm not that much of a bastard... Got a new kitty... She lives at my girlfriend's pad, and her name is Avalon. I will put a pic of her on here as soon as I get one... I think Dave Groll is cool. Why? Because no one thinks of Nirvana, when they think of Dave Groll any more. He has successfully detached him self from that phenomenon, and has his own life in the Foo Fighters. I don't really like the foo fighters all that much though... What I do like is the Beastie Boys... I believe that the future of our world will revolve around music, and art. Music in particular. After all, 'it's the dawning of the age of Aquarius'... but back the the beasties... they have something, it's so much more than just hip-hop, or rock... they are our future... I'm sorry so say almost.. What happened to good old rock music? Everything is so crazy over produced, and nut ball. That is our future..what will make the difference between good and bad, is the attitude behind the music, it doesn't even necessarily have to be the lyrics. Rock n' roll as we knew it is dying, why? Because the new stuff sounds better... doesn't mean it IS better, but it sounds better... Am I babbling?? Oh well... got a bad head ache, but I thought I should write in my global bitch machine before bed... most people have a little section "about me" I have instead decided to basically put a diary out for the world to see, I thought if you really want to know about me, this would be a better way to meet, than just telling you I'm 5 foot 11, with long black hair... Soon to be short black hair, If I ever get the nerve to do it... I have had long black hair for 9 years... been lookin' the same for 9 years... I live in my fucking past, and it has to stop. I'm sick of my past... perhaps I should do something cool in my present so I won't have to live in 1994 any more... Don't get me wrong, my present kicks ass... I got a great girl, I have the strangest...  I mean best kids in the world, and aside from not eating much everything is well... I just wish I was still a psychopath, things are much more interesting when I am. But who's to blame? Just me...